Monday, March 31, 2008
Dubya's a Chucker!
Last night we went to the new Nationals Stadium for the season opener. The Nats beat the Atlanta Braves in the bottom of the ninth and life is good!
The new stadium is absolutely gorgeous and the hoopla for the opening night was nothing short of spectacular! I snapped a great picture of our groovy mayor, Adrian Fenty, on the red carpet before we joined the oh-so-friendly folks in the holding queue. After our cavity search and delousing, we received our commemorative hand towels (aka beer koozies) and lanyards. We moved into the stadium and my mouth dropped as it did the first time I saw Times Square. There were restaurants, bars, food stands, beer stands, music .... it was a real dance potty (I like to say “party” as a Bostonian)!
Following some preliminary cocktails with friends, we found our seats right under the colossal video screen, and sat down to enjoy the fanfare!
After the National Guards and the Color Guards and the National Anthem and the Fighter Planes and the Fireworks ....
and when you’d almost bet you could hear yourself sweat ...
he walked in ...
okay, The Voices in My Head made me do that, it wasn’t nearly that dramatic, but George Bush did jump out of his fancy little golf cart and trot to the pitchers mound to throw out the first ball. I clicked a quick picture of him jogging out to the mound and while my camera gave me a couple of seconds to decide whether or not I liked the shot, he was trotting back! What?! Well, waddya know? Ever-lovin’ George W. Bush is a chucker! Who knew?!
So I studied the photo I did take and here’s what I think happened: Now, granted, the picture strongly resembles the grainy Bigfoot sighting snapshots you see sometimes and I was sitting in such a position that I couldn’t reasonably see the opening to anyone’s trousers (not for lack of trying, wink wink, nudge nudge), but I am pretty sure the president’s fly was down! So, as he’s jogging out there and he feels a little extra coolness in front, he’s thinking, “I’m just going to get out there, chuck the ball at the guy with the big hand, run back to my kick ass buggy, slam the barn door shut and get me a hot dog! You want a hot dog?” This followed by that nervous Muttley giggle he has, and we’re out!
I’m sorry, George Bush is funny! He cracks me up all the time! No wonder his daughter is always falling off her barstool! You know what my daddy said this morning? Ha ha ha ha ... splat!
Oh yeah, baseball! It was really, truly awesome! I can honestly see myself spending much more time with the boys of summer this season! What about you? You want a hot dog?!